Marriage should be honored by all
Hebrews 13:4 - Having a genuine and deep faith in Jesus Christ, confessing your sins to Him, and repenting of those sins will save your eternal life.
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“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”
Hebrews 13:4 NIV
When you get to be the age that Barb and I are, one thing that can really make you happy is knowing about marriages that have lasted. We celebrated our 46th anniversary on June 9th, and a friend I went to high school with just had her 49th wedding anniversary. My parents were married for 64 years before my father passed, and Barb’s parents made it to 57 years before her mother passed.
Today’s verse about honoring marriage comes near the end of Hebrews, in a chapter where Paul exhorts the Jewish Christians (those Jews who believed in Christ) not to revert to their old ways under Mosaic Law and to turn away from sin of all forms. Here Paul’s exhortation turns to the subjects of marriage, fidelity, adultery and sexual immorality.
As you can imagine, some commentaries on this verse are lengthy! Take, for example, this long and detailed collection of commentaries for Hebrews 13:3-4 found on Precept Austin.
Marriage is described very early in the Bible, in Genesis 2:24 — “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” It is a divine institution established by God in which one man and one woman are united as one flesh.
By saying “Marriage should be honored by all”, Paul is emphasizing that marriage should be accorded both respect and sanctity by society, and should not be impacted by cultural trends that choose to cheapen the true meaning of marriage. In the context of the Bible, marriage isn’t just a social contract, but a covenant that reflects God’s relationship with His people. Paul’s message here highlights the role of marriage as a solid foundation both in society and in the church, with a goal of promoting relational and societal stability. Marriage reflects God’s will, pure and simple.
Enduring Word’s David Guzik enumerated the things that dishonor marriage:
Marriage is dishonored by divorce, justified or not.
Marriage is dishonored by living together outside of marriage.
Marriage is dishonored by adultery.
Marriage is dishonored by neglect.
Marriage is dishonored by re-definition.
…”and the marriage bed kept pure” does not mean keeping the sheets clean! It is symbolic of the sexual union between husband and wife, which needs to remain pure and exclusive. God’s desire for sexual purity in marriage was codified in one of His commandments — Exodus 20:14 — which states “You shall not commit adultery.”
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Defiling the marriage bed can also be done through other forms of sexual immorality. What is considered immoral in the context of Christian life? Matt Slick of CARM, a non-profit Christian apologetics ministry, listed the following acts (complete with scripture references):
Adultery
“You shall not have intercourse with your neighbor’s wife, to be defiled with her” (Leviticus 18:20).
Bestiality
“Whoever lies with an animal shall surely be put to death” (Exodus 22:19).
“If there is a man who lies with an animal, he shall surely be put to death; you shall also kill the animal. 16 ‘If there is a woman who approaches any animal to mate with it, you shall kill the woman and the animal; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltiness is upon them” (Leviticus 20:15–16).
“Also you shall not have intercourse with any animal to be defiled with it, nor shall any woman stand before an animal to mate with it; it is a perversion” (Leviticus 18:23).
Homosexuality
“You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination” (Leviticus 18:22).
“and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error” (Romans 1:27).
Incest
“None of you shall approach any blood relative of his to uncover nakedness; I am the LORD” (Leviticus 18:6).
See Leviticus 18:7-17 regarding the prohibition of sexual activity among extended family members.
Lesbianism
“For this reason, God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural” (Romans 1:26).
Prostitution
“You shall not bring the hire of a harlot or the wages of a dog into the house of the LORD your God for any votive offering, for both of these are an abomination to the LORD your God” (Deuteronomy 23:18).
Rape
“But if in the field the man finds the girl who is engaged, and the man forces her and lies with her, then only the man who lies with her shall die” (Deuteronomy 22:25).
Voyeurism
“Now when evening came, David arose from his bed and walked around on the roof of the king’s house, and from the roof, he saw a woman bathing, and the woman was very beautiful in appearance. 3 So David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, “Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” 4 David sent messengers and took her, and when she came to him, he lay with her; and when she had purified herself from her uncleanness, she returned to her house,” (2 Samuel 11:2–4).
“But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28).
The result of not following God’s covenant? “…God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral”. That’s a strict warning found not only here in Hebrews, but also in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10:
“Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
and Galatians 5:19-21:
“The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
God is going to judge and make us accountable for our actions; it’s not our job to judge others. His warning through Paul encourages believers to obey His divine law and live righteously. The Gospel brings both transformation in this life and the hope of restoration to God’s good graces through Christ’s work on the cross.
Failing to live up to the marriage covenant doesn’t have to mean suffering an eternity without God. Having a genuine and deep faith in Jesus Christ, confessing your sins to Him, and repenting of those sins will save your eternal life.
Heaven On Wheels Daily Prayer:
Dear God, thank You for the gift of marriage. Help us to stay faithful to our spouses and to live with honesty, love, and respect. Teach us to honor the promises we’ve made and to live in a way that pleases You. Protect our hearts and keep our thoughts and actions pure. May our marriage show others the love and faithfulness of Jesus. AMEN.
Paul never endorsed slavery. Like everything else in Scripture, it has to be seen in the context of the culture of the time, when there were slaveholders and slaves. You are correct in that Paul makes no effort to condemn the institution of slavery. On the contrary, he urges followers of Christ to work around it and within it. To Timothy, he writes: “Let as many servants as are under the yoke count their own masters worthy of all honour, that the name of God and his doctrine be not blasphemed.” (I Timothy 6:1, KJV). In other words, Christian slaves need to honor their masters, so they can bring credit to Jesus in their testimony.
Sexual immorality of any type is a sin. You can sugar-coat it as much as you want, but you have to realize that God wants us to move away from sin and toward the perfection found in Jesus. My wife and I broke God’s law by living together before we got married. We realize now that was a sin and we have confessed that sin, and asked for God’s forgiveness. We’re not perfect; nobody is. But that’s no reason to just throw away God’s law.
God, from the beginning (Genesis) defined only two genders (male and female) and marriage as between one man and one woman. If you want to argue about this, don’t take it up with me. Take it up with God.
If you accept Paul's criticism of men lying together, you also have to accept his endorsement of slavery. If you accept leviticus criticism of men lying together, you also have to not wear mixed fabrics, stone your children, never shave or eat shellfish.