1 Peter 3 Part 2: True Beauty
1 Peter 3:3-6 - Women: Cultivate inner beauty and reflect a spirit of gentleness and quiet
“Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.”
1 Peter 3:3-6 NASB1995
Peter continues his advice to the women of the church: Cultivate an imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, rather than adorning themselves with fancy hairstyles and gold jewelry and dresses. Peter is not forbidding the adornments, but believes that true beauty is in the hidden heart of a person and those adornments should be quiet and moderate as well (maybe even reflect that old-fashioned thing called modesty). He talks about Sarah obeying and submitting to Abraham and we should do what is right without being frightened by any earthly fear (fear God only).
Looking around our world these days, this advice is lost on most women. But are we so different than the world of early Christianity? This cultural context was found in Precept Austin about the Roman/Pagan world (the original source is unknown but is obviously British due to the monetary values) :
Christianity came into a world of luxury and decadence combined. Purple was the favourite colour for clothes. One pound weight of the best Tyrian purple wool, strained twice through, cost 1,000 denarii, 43.50 pounds. A tyrian cloak of the best purple cost well over 100 pounds. In one year silks, pearls, scents and jewelry were imported from India to the value of 1,000,000 pounds. Similar imports of luxury came from Arabia. Diamonds, emeralds, topazes, opals and the sardonyx were favourite stones. Struma Nonius had a ring valued at 21,250 pounds. Pearls were loved most of all. Julius Caesar bought for Servilia a pearl which cost him 65,250 pounds. Earrings were made of pearls and Seneca spoke of women with two or three fortunes in their ears. Slippers were encrusted with them; Nero even had a room whose walls were covered with them. Pliny saw Lollia Paulina, wife of Caligula, wearing a dress so covered with pearls and emeralds that it had cost 450,000 pounds.
Women over the centuries and even now have clung to adornments, with fashion being an essential part of their external presentation to the world. The dresses and jewels and hairstyles have been joined by tattoos and piercings, with many younger people adapting pagan body art and covering themselves in ink that is nearly impossible to remove. Women’s love of fashion led to the near-extinction of many furred animals and exotic birds for elaborate hats and coats. I can think of one modern influential woman with a strong spirit and inner beauty who also was gentle: Queen Elizabeth II. She dressed modestly and appropriately for her office, but was severely criticized by the fashion elites for her “frumpiness”. It was obvious that she also deferred to her husband and to the Lord and served the people of the UK.
When I think of inner beauty versus outer appearance, for some reason I always think of scenes in the great classic movie “Gone with the Wind”, where Scarlett O’Hara uses her fine sense of fashion and her ability to make herself seem beautiful to get what she wants from many men (money being one of the top goals but she even uses marriages to men she doesn’t love to achieve her goals). She even goes so far as to fake her well-being for Rhett Butler after the war by modifying drapes into an elegant gown and hat to go see him to get money for Tara (if I recall that backfires because she doesn’t seem like a poverty-stricken person and her ego won’t allow an appearance of desperation).
Scarlett’s lifelong romantic target, Ashley Wilkes, is married to the modest and meek Melanie, who personifies what Peter is saying about women and their inner spirit of gentleness and quietude and strong spirit. Melanie surprises Scarlett by shooting an intruder at Tara (a drunk Union soldier), showing that she has no fear, even though she is quite ill. Scarlett never gives up on trying to grab Ashley and her intentions are likely known by Melanie, but Melanie loves Scarlett like a dear sister, in spite of the horrible ways Scarlett treats her. Not to give away the story (everyone knows this story, I presume), but when Melanie dies near the end, Ashley is beside himself, lamenting the loss of her pure spirit. Scarlett is shocked that Ashley truly loved that “meek little mouse” and not her (in my opinion, Ashley was a weak man who led Scarlett on but never “crossed a line”). Scarlett then realizes she loves Rhett, who is almost as shallow as she is, but even he has his limits and he does treat people kindly, something that Scarlett would not understand. He walks away from her and we see her in the last scene plotting ways to get him back.
I have never been very interested in fashion or jewelry or elaborate makeup, although I can dress up when the occasion forces it. This was due to my rebellious spirit that found those things to be a waste of time and money rather than because I have a “gentle and quiet” spirit. For most of my life, I have let others know my thoughts (sought or not) in no uncertain terms and “gentle and quiet” are not adjectives that you would associate with Barb (there’s always time to change that, with help from the Lord). God finds that type of spirit to be incorruptible and precious in His eyes, far more than gold or pearls. I have always admired friends and acquaintances that have cultivated that inner beauty. They are women you can trust and love and they are RARE. Here are some final words on this passage from Enduring Word commentary:
Rather let it be the hidden person of the heart: Real beauty comes from the hidden person of the heart. It isn’t something you wear or primp before a mirror to have. It is something you are.
The real question is “What do you depend on to make yourself beautiful?” Peter’s point is not that any of these are forbidden, but that they should not be a woman’s adornment, the source of her true beauty.
The incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit: The inner beauty of a godly woman is incorruptible. This means that it does not decay or get worse with age. Instead, incorruptible beauty only gets better with age, and is therefore of much greater value than the beauty that comes from the hair, jewelry, or clothing.
A gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God: Peter described the character of true beauty – a gentle and quiet spirit. These character traits are not promoted for women by our culture; yet they are very precious in the sight of God.
Who trusted in God: When women submit to their husbands and when they do not put trust in their outward adornment, they are like the holy women of former times who trusted in God. They powerfully demonstrate their faith.
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A woman can trust her own ability to influence and control her husband, or she can trust God and be submissive. A woman can trust her outward beauty and adornment, or she can trust God and cultivate a gentle and quiet spirit. It all comes back to trust in God; so she should be like the holy women who trusted in God.
As Sarah obeyed Abraham: Two things demonstrated Sarah’s submission to Abraham. First, she obeyed Abraham even when it was difficult and even when he was wrong (as in Genesis 12:10-20). Second, she honored Abraham by calling him lord. It is possible to obey someone without showing them the honor that is part of submission. True submission knows the place of both obedience and honor.
My next devotional examines 1 Peter 3: 7 - A Godly Husband
Heaven on Wheels Daily Prayer:
Dear Lord - Please guide me into an inner beauty of gentleness and meekness and honor and submission to Steve. This is a BIG personality change for me to emulate those beautiful traits, so I need daily guidance and conviction from the Holy Spirit. I humbly ask for this in Jesus name. Amen.
Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org
Commentary from Enduring Word by David Guzik is used with written permission.